Crazy Bonds
by Chedving
Summary: Once there was a hidden village. It was peaceful and nothing could've disturbed it...until a single event changed it drastically. The question is - for better or for worse?


Disclaimer- _I don't own Naruto, and this story is non-profitable. However, I own story plot to some degree, along with some stuff in this story_

"Talking"

'_Thinking'_

And so the story begins…

* * *

Hokage office, Konoha

* * *

It was a nice summer day in Konoha, with sun high above and fluffy white clouds lazily sailing across the blue sky. The weather was warm, with nice cool breeze drifting around the bustling village. It was a day on which some people worked, some were spending their time with their beloved ones, and some simply lazing around. For children, it was a nice day for fun and joy.

In the middle of the Konoha stood a tower, also known as a Hokage tower, where resides most, if not all, of village's bureaucrats. Also, it was a main office to the leader of the village, the Hokage. Currently, it was occupied by Sarutobi, the Sandaime Hokage. And who currently had a quite troublesome problem on his hands. Beside him, the room was occupied by other three people.

One was a man in his early twenties. He was 5'9 feet tall, with chocolate brown hair tied into ponytail and a horizontal scar on his nose, just below his brown eyes. He wore standard chuunin garb, that being blue uniform with green jacket over it. He had a forehead protector with Leaf symbol engraved on it tied around his forehead. His name was Umino Iruka, a teacher in Ninja Academy, who had his full attention focused on Sandaime.

Second person was a woman around the same age as Iruka, with light purple hair, tied in the same fashion as Iruka, with brown yes. She stood 5'6 feet tall, and wore quite revealing outfit, not to mention a bright one too. She was known as an apprentice of now an S-class criminal, a special jounin Mitarashi Anko, who lazily looked at Hokage.

The last person, who was standing between the couple, was a boy around 6, with spiky blond hair and whisker-like marks on his cheeks, three on each one. He wore a white shirt with red spiral on back and front, with black shorts and open-toe sandals, which was a favorite foot-wear of most ninjas in the village. Villagers feared and hated him, for he was a container of a Kyuubi, a great demon that almost destroyed Konoha, and who was later sealed inside the newborn child by a Yondaime, who died in process. His name was Uzumaki Naruto. Currently, he was busy looking around the office with curious expression.

The Hokage shuffled through the papers that were neatly stacked in piles, gathering his thoughts while smoking his ever present pipe. After he deemed that it was time to begin, and seeing that Naruto was getting impatient he coughed and spoke.

"As you can guess, I gathered you three here for a good reason. It seems that the last caretaker of Naruto refused this job anymore for unknown reasons," he said while watching the reaction of the three. Naruto lost his cheerfulness, for he knew that those reasons were he. Iruka looked at Naruto, concern clearly showing on his face. Only Anko looked the same, for she had no interest in this, if only a bit. A kid lost a caretaker, a bad thing indeed, but she didn't understand why would it bother her of all people ?

"Seeing that it was not the first caretaker that quit his job, I decided to take another approach to this problem," he said while looking at a scroll that he picked up from the table, examining its contents, giving a last thought to his decision. "Iruka, I must thank you for taking care of him for a while, but I must to free you of this task…" he was interrupted by Iruka, who looked at him surprised.

"Hokage-sama, I must say that it wasn't a big problem for me to take care of him and I can…." he was stopped by Hokage's raised hand.

"I know that Iruka, but I don't think you will have much time to take care of him, for as a teacher in Academy, you have a lot of work as it is. Beside, I already picked up another person who I deemed was worth for such task. But first.." he said while throwing a scroll at Anko, who effortlessly caught it. "Read it please, this is your next mission" he finished before relaxing in his seat.

Anko's interest was picked up by this. She quickly scanned through the scroll's contents, her face becoming more paler and eyes widening in shock as she finished reading it. Iruka looked at her curiously, while Naruto looked at her strangely. After waiting for a minute and seeing that Anko isn't coming to her senses anytime soon, Iruka decided to read the scroll himself. He looked at Hokage for approval, and seeing him nod in approval, took the scroll from Anko's numb fingers. As he scanned through its contents, his face was becoming similar to Anko's, and shortly, he too became a statue. Naruto looked at both of them curiously, and seeing that they were going to play whatever they were played at the moment, he ventured towards a shelf full of various scrolls and books.

Sarutobi patiently waited for both Anko and Iruka to come to their senses, while he smoked his pipe. His attention was diverted towards Naruto, who was standing before the shelf of rare texts and things that he gathered when he was young. He then watched as he went back to Anko and started to walk around her in circles while poking her. He sighed and addressed towards Naruto, deciding to tell him the news himself, seeing that both Anko and Iruka aren't coming to their senses soon.

"Naruto, do you know why are you here ?" he asked him. Naruto looked at him curiously, before shaking his head in negatively. "Well, I am going to give you a special caretaker. Naruto, meet your new caretaker, Mitarashi Anko."

This seemed to bring back to life both Anko and Iruka, hearing that what their read in the scroll was true and not some joke. Reaction was instant.

"WHAT!!!!?" came from two of them, making Naruto to cover his ears. Sarutobi only sighed. He felt a migraine coming from this entire ordeal.

"As you heard. Anko is the new caretaker of one Uzumaki Naruto, starting of today," he said before breathing a white cloud of smoke.

"But why her of all people ?!" asked Iruka, after the information fully settled into his brain.

"Yeah!!!" agreed Anko. She wasn't some babysitter, she was a professional ninja, thought by a very powerful ninja. She was thought to kill, make clever and powerful traps, all kind of genjutsu and ninjutsu…

"There were a lot of things I could mention, but all I can say that Anko suits for this job the best," explained Sandaime while looking at Iruka.

…and now a babysitter for a demon vessel of all things. She looked at the kid, who was in front of her, studying her face with curiosity…and hope ?

"But her?!" shouted Iruka while pointing at Anko, who glared at him.

"Is there something that I should know about her Iruka?" asked Sarutobi, while looking at him.

"She isn't fit to take care of a child, let alone to raise it. She has a horrible sense of style…."said Iruka while pointing at her.

"HEY!!!!" shouted Anko, glaring daggers at Iruka.

"…and I can bet she doesn't know a thing about how to take care of a child!!!" he finished while turning his head to glare at her, which she returned with vengeance.

"Of course I know how to take care of a child!!! You only need to keep it clean and satisfied," she said while sticking her nose into air arrogantly, which made Iruka more furious.

"Naruto's not a _thing_!!" he shouted, towering above her, which made Anko to lean backward from the force of Iruka's shout. As she was opening her mouth to retort him, Sandaime interrupted her.

"Please, could you stop it?" he asked them as he puffed another white cloud. He sighed, seeing that both _adults_ before him were still glaring at each other. At least now they were paying attention to him. He coughed again, making all three of them at him before he continued.

"Seeing that this is getting us nowhere, let's ask Naruto what does _he_ thinks about this whole thing," he said while looking at Naruto, who was hiding behind Iruka.

"Huh?" came a very intelligent response from 6-year old boy, who looked at him surprised.

"Naruto, what do you think about Anko here," asked Sandaime while indicating at Anko, who took a pose and smiled broadly at Naruto. He looked at her with wide eyes and mouth open.

"She is...she is…," started Naruto, at which Anko breathed deeply, making all of her attributes to stand out, which didn't go unnoticed by both Iruka and Hokage. "…SO LAME!!!" finished Naruto while pointing at her accusing finger.

Hearing this, Hokage softly laughed while Iruka tried to hide a smile, and failed miserably. Anko for her part choked started to cough loudly, bending in half in process. After she recovered from the shock, she quickly straightened up, glaring daggers at Naruto, who returned it without hesitation.

"What did you say?!" she growled out while slowly advancing on him. Naruto only blew her raspberry before ducking behind Iruka.

"Ahem," Sandaime cleared his throat, and seeing that he got everyone's attention again, continued. "Anko, from this day on to further notice, you are a new caretaker of Uzumaki Naruto. This will be a C rank mission, bordering low B. You will get a month to decide if you would like to proceed with this task," he said and seeing her scowling face, decided to play his triumph card," and if everything will be OK, you will get a free odangoes for whole month."

At this Anko's face instantly changed from creepy scowling to crazily happy face, with a smile plastered all over her face. She looked at Naruto, who looked at her cautiously and with a bit of fear.

"You heard that shrimp? We are going to spend together a whole month. Isn't that great?" she asked him sweetly while her eyes sparkling. Now Naruto looked at her like she was crazy. He then looked back at Hokage, then at Anko, then back at Hokage.

"Old man, you must be _kidding_!!! There's absolutely _no _way I am going with this crazy old hag!!!" shouted Naruto while jamming his thumb in Anko's direction. Hearing this, Anko's cheerful and slightly crazy expression changed into that of demonic one, with fire in her eyes and snarl instead of the smile. She quickly grabbed him by the front of his shirt and lifted his up.

"Listen you punk, you _are_ going to stay with me, like or not," she growled at him while he tried to loosen her grip on his shirt. He only scowled at her words, before resuming his trashing.

"See?! There's absolutely no way she could take care of him. She is too irresponsible for this kind of job. I think you should reconsider this Hokage-sama," said Iruka while trying to free Naruto from Anko's grip.

"There's another reason why I chose Anko for this job. It will teach her responsibility, which, as I heard from numerous reports, she is lacking," he said the last part while looking at Anko, who looked at Sandaime sheepishly, free hand behind her head. Naruto chose this moment to bite her holding hand.

"Ouch!!" cried out Anko while releasing Naruto, who fell landed on his butt. They both glared at each other, sparks practically flying between them. Iruka stood to the side, not really knowing what to do in this kind of situation. A cough from Hokage broke the glaring match between Naruto and Anko, while also attracting Iruka's attention.

"Naruto, I can promise you one thing if you'll agree to this. A free ramen for a whole month," seeing Naruto's grinning face, he added as an afterthought, "Only _if_ you will live with Anko for a month." Noticing a frown on his face, he sighed and looked at Iruka for a help. Iruka, noticing that everyone was staring at him, scratched his head nervously before looking at Naruto's hopeful eyes.

"What can I say….good luck? Oh, and if _anything_ happens, you can always tell me, and I'll see what I can do. And Naruto,' he said while motioning him to come closer and whispering something into his ear. Naruto looked back at Anko, before nodding at Iruka and moving towards Anko with a sullen face. Anko looked at him, before looking at innocently smiling Iruka. She frowned at this, bud decided to let it slip. For now at least.

"Anko, before you leave, don't forget to see my secretary for additional money. You will need to buy things for Naruto. And _don't_ spend it on useless stuff," said Sandaime in stern voice while glaring at Anko, who laughed nervously while scratching behind her head. Naruto only rolled his eyes before walking out of the office, on his was thinking about what he will do now that he lives with that _woman_. Anko seeing this quickly took her queue and bowing to Sandaime, quickly followed Naruto. Sandaime looked at Iruka, who was nervously fidgeting in his place.

"What is it Iruka?" he asked in calm voice, while puffing out a cloud of smoke from him mouth. Iruka looked at him, and then fidgeted while trying to formulate what he wanted to say.

"Ano," begun Iruka," what was the real reason for this decision? You know about her lack of experience with this kind of stuff. Beside, her attitude will not go smoothly with Naruto's, and this may result in some very awkward situations," he finished before looking at Sandaime, who nodded his head before thinking what to answer.

"Hmm, I see your point. The real reason is that maybe this will help to protect Naruto from hatred from villagers, for I know that they could try and get rid of him. Also, I don't want him to run away from the village. Besides, Anko is the most suitable for this. She is very similar to Naruto, and her attitude is very similar to his, this making easier for both of them to understand each other."

"Or it may result in a _very_ disturbing situation. And beside, I _know_ from my own experience that she as much loving pranks as Naruto, and if they _ever_ will get along well, it will be major problem for us," said Iruka, while looking straight into Sandaime's eyes. Both sweat dropped at the mental image of two pranksters making chaos amok village's population.

"Now that you mentioned it..." said Hokage while thinking over the situation from new point.

* * *

Outside the Hokage office

* * *

Anko stood with her arms crossed and looked down at Naruto with thoughtful look. Naruto, for his part, was looking up at Anko with half-lidded stare with arms folded across his chest. The silent staring competition was interrupted by a loud growl from Naruto's stomach. Anko raised her eyebrow at this, while Naruto looked at her sheepishly.

"Hmm, it seems someone is a bit hungry," she commented before smiling gleefully, confirming Naruto's earlier suspicion about her being mentally unstable. It was Naruto's turn to grin like a fox and Anko's turn to look sheepish as a growl now came from her stomach.

"You're one to talk," he said before looking around them. There were peoples sending him cold glares while some looked at Anko with disapproval mixed with a bit of fear. The first ones he understood, but the second ones? It was _too_ confusing for his young head.

"Anyway, we should get going to get something. Hmm, how about…" said Anko before she was rudely interrupted by Naruto who exclaimed a sacred word. For him at least.

"RAMEN!!!!" he exclaimed while looking at her with wide eyes and matching grin. She looked at him first surprised with his reaction, then annoyed that he interrupted her.

"Ahem, as I was saying, how about some odangoes!!" she exclaimed, her eyes wide and sparkly and grin the same as Naruto's moments earlier. Naruto, on the other hand, looked at her like she was someone crazy. _Everybody_ loved ramen, at least his 6-years old mind thought so.

"No way! That stuff will make you only fatter" he said while turning his back to her, "while ramen will get you all slim and good-looking," he exclaimed while posing before her. He once saw how some weird guy did the same thing. His posing was interrupted by an elbow landing on his head. When he looked up, he saw Anko's _very_ irritated glare.

"Are you saying that I am fat _and_ that odangoes are bad?" she said through her gritted teeth, while her mind was coming up with dozens of ways how to make Naruto's life a _real Hell_. Then she remembered what Hokage told her about free odangoes for a whole _month_. She instantly calmed down before turning around and going down the street, Naruto following her while still glaring at her, which she totally ignored.

"Fine, we will get you your ramen…_after _I ate _my_ precious odangoes. Do you know how much energy does this body needs to keep all handy-dandy?" she asked him while tracing her hand across it. Few males that passed by were leering at her. Moments later they were either hit by their second half, or impacted with other people. Naruto only snorted, before placing his hands behind his head and continuing walking behind his new caretaker. Anko, who didn't expect an answer from little brat anyway, smiled to herself. It soon turned into maniacal grin, that scared all people around her, be that simple shopkeeper, or veteran shinobi. Meanwhile Naruto was imagining something good too, for soon his own grin coming over his sullen face. Now this scared everyone.

'_Annoying little brat'_, thought Anko idly while looking at Naruto sideways.

'_Weird psycho-lady'_, thought Naruto while sending a glare at Anko. Their gazes met each other, and instantly turned into full-out glaring contest. They didn't even notice that everyone was parting before them, and trying to keep as far as they could from the glaring pair, their survival instincts kicking in.

Konoha will _never_ be the same again from now on.

* * *

To Be Continued...

_Well, this is a story that says "**I'm back to writing fan fiction!!!**" Beside, I wanted to try and make one Naruto story, see if anything would work for me._

_I'm a man of few words, so all I'm saying is a)I will try to update as ASAP b)get ready for many surprises, for I am a master at creating them _

_So don't forget to C&C, for it will help me not to go into hibernating like I did before._

**_Flames and rude criticism will be sent to Heaven,_**

_**Comments, praises and CC will be sent to Siberia (**I like cold_


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